Chinese bachelors looking for love are increasingly specifying a preference for women without brothers, according to reports. This trend has arisen from a fear that having a brother could result in a lack of attention from their future wives, leading to the coining of the term “Fu Dimo,” or “brother’s supporter monster.”
The South China Morning Post (SCMP) recently reported that a dating event held earlier this month in Shandong province saw more than 4,000 unmarried men and women in attendance, with many of the men specifically seeking women without brothers. One man, born in 1990, even emphasized in his self-introduction that his ideal girlfriend should have a stable job, own a car, and a flat, but must not have a brother. Another participant born in 1998 wrote that he was searching for a “kind and considerate” woman but specified that she must not have a brother.
Some women have also started disclosing the fact that they do not have brothers in their dating profiles in response to the trend. One 27-year-old woman stated that although she has a brother, he is attending a top university and therefore will not be a burden to her future partner.
Experts believe that the trend is driven by the fear that wives with brothers will prioritize their siblings over their husbands and new family members. “Men are worried that their future wives may only care about their brothers and neglect their new family. Chinese parents also tend to raise their daughters to take care of their brothers,” said Zhang Puhui, a consultant at the Shandong Future Psychology Consulting Research Institute.
The dating event has sparked discussions on social media, with one netizen stating that “the problem isn’t having a brother, it’s being a ‘Fu Dimo,'” while another claimed to know people who are also seeking brides without brothers.
In a country where traditional gender roles still hold sway, the demand for brides without brothers reflects the evolving expectations and concerns of modern Chinese men seeking a fulfilling and equal partnership.